3 gifts that might have never been
It's been 6 years now, so the wounds are healed and the anger is gone. But when my longtime friend of twenty years decided that our friendship wasn't worth saving, my first instinct was to regret (1) ever meeting her, (2) giving it a second chance when things went south the first time while we were in college, (3) rekindling the friendship after I was out of college and married, (4) moving to the town she lived in (completely NOT because she was here but because when Bret was hired in this city, we were familiar with and liked the community after visiting her over the years) where we can still run into each other, and (5) making her Jessie's godmother.
But I can't regret any of those, except for possibly the last. If I had never met her, and been friends as an adult and mother, my life would be unrecognizably different now. What might have never been?
1. She introduced me to the music of Rich Mullins, Andrew Peterson, and Sara Groves. Three amazing songwriters and musicians who have brought countless hours of listening pleasure to my life. And who have inspired me to stretch as a Christian and as a person. Their music has basically been the soundtrack to my faith journey. I simply cannot imagine my life without their music, yet if not for her, I very well may have never heard them. Their songs are rarely played on the radio, and none of my friends are big fans.
2. I would never have chosen to live where we do. It's just not on the radar of many people who don't live here. If we had never heard of it when we moved here, we would have likely moved to the other side of town, since that's where most of Bret's coworkers and friends lived, and they all love their respective communities. We'd have heard them talk about what great places they are to live, and we would have been convinced that one of them was the right place for us. But we love our community, our schools, our church, and our home, and can't imagine living anywhere else. It's perfect for us, and the friends we've made are irreplaceable. But I would have never even known about it if we hadn't visited my friend here over the years.
3. And as for Jessie -- while it broke my heart to witness her broken heart when her most beloved godmother (her favorite person in the world) "ditched" her (as Jessie so eloquently put it), I think I can't completely regret that decision, either. If we had given Jessie a different godmother, she wouldn't have had her heart broken, it's true. But ... when it happened, we told Jessie that since she was almost 5 years old, she could choose her own replacement godmother. She chose the person who I would have chosen for her, one of my friends who loved her dearly even before they had an official "special" relationship. If I were going to have a fourth child, she would have been the obvious choice. And she is the perfect godmother for Jessie. When I keep in mind that if we'd given Jessie a different godmother, one who wouldn't have "ditched" her, she would not have Miss S. And it is as it should be.
Monday, January 28, 2013
January 26
A gift before 9 a.m., a gift before noon, a gift after dark
1. Everyone in the house was up, ready and out the door by 9:00 for the Pinewood Derby. No rushing around looking for parts of Jacob's uniform, no complaints from Josh about having to wear his BSA uniform (with no notice), and Jessie even had her ballet bag ready for rehearsal afterwards.
2. Pinewood derby went well, although Jacob was disappointed to not win a single heat (second place every time). But I'm always nervous that something will happen and the car won't run well.
3. We bought a new sectional for the basement and broke it in watching a movie with the boys. The movie was terrible (the boys loved it) but it was so nice for all of us to be able to lounge on the sofa. Jessie was at a sleepover, but there's still plenty of room.
1. Everyone in the house was up, ready and out the door by 9:00 for the Pinewood Derby. No rushing around looking for parts of Jacob's uniform, no complaints from Josh about having to wear his BSA uniform (with no notice), and Jessie even had her ballet bag ready for rehearsal afterwards.
2. Pinewood derby went well, although Jacob was disappointed to not win a single heat (second place every time). But I'm always nervous that something will happen and the car won't run well.
3. We bought a new sectional for the basement and broke it in watching a movie with the boys. The movie was terrible (the boys loved it) but it was so nice for all of us to be able to lounge on the sofa. Jessie was at a sleepover, but there's still plenty of room.
January 24
3 things blue
1. My mood. Not sure why, exactly, but I need to snap out of it.
2. My purse. I love my little blue purse.
3. Jessie's eyes. They are the most amazing shade of light blue -- sometimes grey, sometimes a bit greenish. People used to say that about mine -- I'll have to compare and see if they're the same shade. Then again, that would depend on the day. :)
1. My mood. Not sure why, exactly, but I need to snap out of it.
2. My purse. I love my little blue purse.
3. Jessie's eyes. They are the most amazing shade of light blue -- sometimes grey, sometimes a bit greenish. People used to say that about mine -- I'll have to compare and see if they're the same shade. Then again, that would depend on the day. :)
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
January 22
A gift wrinkled, smoothed, unfolded
1. My fingers after being in the water for the new Tabata Aqua Gym class. I missed the first two weeks due to strep and bronchitis, but am determined to be more committed this session than I was in the fall. I am blessed to be able to go during the mornings -- I can drop Josh at the bus stop and then head to the pool. It would be a huge challenge to make it to the evening classes.
2. I'm in the process of framing and hanging photos. It's pretty embarrassing that we've been in the house for over 4 years and most have not made it onto the walls. I've run across a few that were creased a bit here and there. Rather than not framing them, I've put them into frames and hung them anyway. I thought it would bother me to see the imperfections, but surprisingly, I don't even notice them because my attention is captured by the smiles on our faces.
3.
1. My fingers after being in the water for the new Tabata Aqua Gym class. I missed the first two weeks due to strep and bronchitis, but am determined to be more committed this session than I was in the fall. I am blessed to be able to go during the mornings -- I can drop Josh at the bus stop and then head to the pool. It would be a huge challenge to make it to the evening classes.
2. I'm in the process of framing and hanging photos. It's pretty embarrassing that we've been in the house for over 4 years and most have not made it onto the walls. I've run across a few that were creased a bit here and there. Rather than not framing them, I've put them into frames and hung them anyway. I thought it would bother me to see the imperfections, but surprisingly, I don't even notice them because my attention is captured by the smiles on our faces.
3.
January 21
A gift in sky, water, memory
1. After a week of overcast skies and rain, we've had 2 days of cloudless, bright blue skies. The trees may be naked but the blue makes me happy. And if it were spring or summer and the trees were filled with leaves, I would see much less of the brilliant blue.
2. My crock pot crock has been soaking for 2 days and I finally washed it out and put it away, ready for the next slow-cooked meal. I rarely use it, but last week I used it three days in a row, for hearty and healthy meals that made my house smell wonderful and were actually enjoyed by everyone in the family. I really need to use it more often.
3. My grandfather's birthday was yesterday. He would have been 95. I have so many wonderful memories of Granddaddy -- and so much of my life was shaped by who he was and how he lived.
1. After a week of overcast skies and rain, we've had 2 days of cloudless, bright blue skies. The trees may be naked but the blue makes me happy. And if it were spring or summer and the trees were filled with leaves, I would see much less of the brilliant blue.
2. My crock pot crock has been soaking for 2 days and I finally washed it out and put it away, ready for the next slow-cooked meal. I rarely use it, but last week I used it three days in a row, for hearty and healthy meals that made my house smell wonderful and were actually enjoyed by everyone in the family. I really need to use it more often.
3. My grandfather's birthday was yesterday. He would have been 95. I have so many wonderful memories of Granddaddy -- and so much of my life was shaped by who he was and how he lived.
Sunday, January 20, 2013
January 20
3 gifts only seen close up
1. (Hopefully) My wrinkles. Like all women, I fret about the appearance of lines on my face. And now I'm beginning to see evidence of sun damage on my hands, my arms and my feet. But so far, I don't think my wrinkles (more like crinkles) are too bad yet. I have the laugh lines around my eyes and think that I'd rather have lines because I've laughed a lot than have a smooth visage. And the summers I spent in Colorado were totally worth the extra freckles on my shoulders. I think those summers are responsible for some of my laugh lines as well.
2.
3.
1. (Hopefully) My wrinkles. Like all women, I fret about the appearance of lines on my face. And now I'm beginning to see evidence of sun damage on my hands, my arms and my feet. But so far, I don't think my wrinkles (more like crinkles) are too bad yet. I have the laugh lines around my eyes and think that I'd rather have lines because I've laughed a lot than have a smooth visage. And the summers I spent in Colorado were totally worth the extra freckles on my shoulders. I think those summers are responsible for some of my laugh lines as well.
2.
3.
January 17
One gift that made you laugh, one gift that made you pray, one gift that made you quiet.
1. Josh has a tremendous, advanced vocabulary. But he constantly mispronounces words, and I threaten to make a book of them. His latest is negotiate -- "Joshized" to sound like nee-oh-she-gate. We shouldn't laugh at him, but we can't help it. Fortunately, it doesn't faze him -- he still argues the logic of his pronunciations. Hilarious.
2. Fellowship with my BSF group. There are some amazing women in our group. Two are from Indonesia, and have been here for just over a decade. One of them was talking about how challenging it is for her to do her homework since she is still not completely fluent in English, so she needs to use her dictionary to translate frequently. Yet she always manages to finish. I am humbled by her dedication, and made the comment that I have no excuses to not finish mine, ever. I pray that I can be as faithful to my study as she is to hers.
3. Listening to Jessie and her friend discuss which camp session they want to go to in June. There are several options and they both had their initial favorite, which were not the same. But they are both sweet, accommodating girls, so I had to smile when listening to them. Neither wants to push the other into something she doesn't want to do. It's such a gift for Jessie to have a friend who doesn't require her to capitulate all the time. Her friend Janae is the same way, and a perfect friend for her, but she's a grade ahead and not in Girl Scouts, and not going to camp.
1. Josh has a tremendous, advanced vocabulary. But he constantly mispronounces words, and I threaten to make a book of them. His latest is negotiate -- "Joshized" to sound like nee-oh-she-gate. We shouldn't laugh at him, but we can't help it. Fortunately, it doesn't faze him -- he still argues the logic of his pronunciations. Hilarious.
2. Fellowship with my BSF group. There are some amazing women in our group. Two are from Indonesia, and have been here for just over a decade. One of them was talking about how challenging it is for her to do her homework since she is still not completely fluent in English, so she needs to use her dictionary to translate frequently. Yet she always manages to finish. I am humbled by her dedication, and made the comment that I have no excuses to not finish mine, ever. I pray that I can be as faithful to my study as she is to hers.
3. Listening to Jessie and her friend discuss which camp session they want to go to in June. There are several options and they both had their initial favorite, which were not the same. But they are both sweet, accommodating girls, so I had to smile when listening to them. Neither wants to push the other into something she doesn't want to do. It's such a gift for Jessie to have a friend who doesn't require her to capitulate all the time. Her friend Janae is the same way, and a perfect friend for her, but she's a grade ahead and not in Girl Scouts, and not going to camp.
January 16
3 ways you witnessed happiness today
1. Jacob doing well at his Syllables session. He beat his teacher at a game and was on a high for the rest of the evening.
2. Josh and I went to the dermatologist this morning. He had a wart on the arch of his foot and the doctor had to cut it out. He was a real trooper, even though he was scared and it hurt. He couldn't walk on it so I let him stay home from school. He was quite happy to have a day off. He gets sick so rarely that he almost never misses school -- I think he's been out maybe 5 days since starting kindergarten. So it was a treat for him to be out and not be sick.
3. I had to run in to the elementary school this morning, and ran into Jacob's class. Every time I show up, they make me feel like a rock star. I get hugs from half the class, but Jacob's face lights up when he sees me and he always gives me a huge hug. I have to pry him off of me. I know that I don't have too many more years of this sort of reaction, so I savor it when I get it. I still get it from Jessie, too. :)
1. Jacob doing well at his Syllables session. He beat his teacher at a game and was on a high for the rest of the evening.
2. Josh and I went to the dermatologist this morning. He had a wart on the arch of his foot and the doctor had to cut it out. He was a real trooper, even though he was scared and it hurt. He couldn't walk on it so I let him stay home from school. He was quite happy to have a day off. He gets sick so rarely that he almost never misses school -- I think he's been out maybe 5 days since starting kindergarten. So it was a treat for him to be out and not be sick.
3. I had to run in to the elementary school this morning, and ran into Jacob's class. Every time I show up, they make me feel like a rock star. I get hugs from half the class, but Jacob's face lights up when he sees me and he always gives me a huge hug. I have to pry him off of me. I know that I don't have too many more years of this sort of reaction, so I savor it when I get it. I still get it from Jessie, too. :)
January 15
One thing you wore, one thing you gave away, one thing you shared
1. My fire opal ring from Sedona. I bought it when I met Jen there in January '11, with a gift card that my dad gave me for my birthday the month before. I specifically saved it to buy something for myself on that trip, and every time I wear it, I remember what a great trip it was. And it makes me think of my dad, which is appropriate, since he grew up in Arizona. So it makes me remember stories from his childhood, as well as my grandparents.
2. We are purging and clearing out as much "stuff" as possible. Every week there's a box of clothes, books, miscellaneous items going to one charity or another. We still have a ways to go, but it feels good.
3. I had lunch with Kim today. I miss having her in Scouts with me, but I am thankful that we are still able to get together. I'm thankful that they didn't move away, and I'm thankful that our friendship is based on more than Scouts.
1. My fire opal ring from Sedona. I bought it when I met Jen there in January '11, with a gift card that my dad gave me for my birthday the month before. I specifically saved it to buy something for myself on that trip, and every time I wear it, I remember what a great trip it was. And it makes me think of my dad, which is appropriate, since he grew up in Arizona. So it makes me remember stories from his childhood, as well as my grandparents.
2. We are purging and clearing out as much "stuff" as possible. Every week there's a box of clothes, books, miscellaneous items going to one charity or another. We still have a ways to go, but it feels good.
3. I had lunch with Kim today. I miss having her in Scouts with me, but I am thankful that we are still able to get together. I'm thankful that they didn't move away, and I'm thankful that our friendship is based on more than Scouts.
January 13
3 things about yourself you are grateful for
1. My love of reading. I have friends who don't love to read, and they are fulfilled, and their lives do not feel like they are missing something. Yet I can't imagine having that life. True, I don't read as much as I used to, but I miss it. I love getting sucked into a great book. And I love that my husband and children share that love.
2. My blue eyes. I know it sounds shallow, and Lord knows my husband and first-born are beautiful with their chocolate-brown eyes. But I love my eye color. And if I didn't have blue eyes, neither would my two youngest children. And I love their blue eyes. They're distinctly different colors, but they're perfect for them.
3. My ablility to see things from other peoples' perspectives. It gets me into trouble sometimes -- it makes it easier for me to be taken advantage of -- but I think it's a valuable skill. And, in my opinion, a bit too rare. If only everyone were able to look outside of their own perspectives.
1. My love of reading. I have friends who don't love to read, and they are fulfilled, and their lives do not feel like they are missing something. Yet I can't imagine having that life. True, I don't read as much as I used to, but I miss it. I love getting sucked into a great book. And I love that my husband and children share that love.
2. My blue eyes. I know it sounds shallow, and Lord knows my husband and first-born are beautiful with their chocolate-brown eyes. But I love my eye color. And if I didn't have blue eyes, neither would my two youngest children. And I love their blue eyes. They're distinctly different colors, but they're perfect for them.
3. My ablility to see things from other peoples' perspectives. It gets me into trouble sometimes -- it makes it easier for me to be taken advantage of -- but I think it's a valuable skill. And, in my opinion, a bit too rare. If only everyone were able to look outside of their own perspectives.
January 11
3 yellow things that strike you as fresh mercy.
1. Sunlight after an overcast day (or week). Or, for that matter, any time, but it seems that I only really appreciate the sunlight after being without it for a period of time. Isn't that really true of most things?
2. The tart, fresh smell of a lemon. There was a funky smell in the garbage disposal, so when I had juiced a lemon, I put the remains down the disposal. The funky smell was replaced with the clean, citrus aroma of the lemon.
3. Daisies. I have always loved daisies. Simple and sweet, and timeless.
1. Sunlight after an overcast day (or week). Or, for that matter, any time, but it seems that I only really appreciate the sunlight after being without it for a period of time. Isn't that really true of most things?
2. The tart, fresh smell of a lemon. There was a funky smell in the garbage disposal, so when I had juiced a lemon, I put the remains down the disposal. The funky smell was replaced with the clean, citrus aroma of the lemon.
3. Daisies. I have always loved daisies. Simple and sweet, and timeless.
January 10
A gift that's sour, a gift that's sweet, a gift that's Just. Right.
1. Leigh gave me a bag of Meyer lemons from her mom's tree in Florida. Yum. I made lemon poppyseed muffins and lemon pound cake with them. The juice was tart, but a bit sweet, too.
2. The kids gave me a box of chocolates in my stocking for Christmas. I don't ever like all the varieties in assortments, but some of them were truly delicious.
3. As always, I made toffee at Christmas. As a matter of fact, I still need to make one last batch. One of the batches turned out a bit soft, but the rest were just perfect. I love to keep our tin in the refrigerator and then every other day or so treat myself to one. Yum.
1. Leigh gave me a bag of Meyer lemons from her mom's tree in Florida. Yum. I made lemon poppyseed muffins and lemon pound cake with them. The juice was tart, but a bit sweet, too.
2. The kids gave me a box of chocolates in my stocking for Christmas. I don't ever like all the varieties in assortments, but some of them were truly delicious.
3. As always, I made toffee at Christmas. As a matter of fact, I still need to make one last batch. One of the batches turned out a bit soft, but the rest were just perfect. I love to keep our tin in the refrigerator and then every other day or so treat myself to one. Yum.
Wednesday, January 16, 2013
January 9
A gift in your hand, a gift you walked by, a gift you sat with
1. For the past few years, Josh has gradually become less inclined to show any physical affection, especially to his mom. But every so often, we'll be walking somewhere and his hand will find his way to mine. He won't actually make it to full-fledged hand-holding, mind you, but he might hook a finger around one of mine. And for that fleeting instant, I am transported back to when he was a snuggly little boy who wanted nothing more than to climb into my lap or snuggle up next to me on the couch, pressing his warm body to mine. Sigh.
2. I'm in the midst of purging and decluttering. The closets, the basement, the kitchen cabinets, my office.... As a result, we have pictures and posters leaning up against random walls throughout the house, waiting for me to decide where they will be hung, or whether, in fact, they will be hung. One such item was a gift when we had Josh. One of Bret's co-workers cross-stitched "Joshua" and framed it. It hung in his bedroom until we moved into this house. Now, I don't know what to do with it. I expect I'll hang onto it, although the odds are probably pretty slim that any of the children will have a son named Josh (or even if they did, they may not want this particular piece of art).
3. My BSF study is a real treasure, and I love the time I spend sitting with the Word. I need to devote more of my time to that.
1. For the past few years, Josh has gradually become less inclined to show any physical affection, especially to his mom. But every so often, we'll be walking somewhere and his hand will find his way to mine. He won't actually make it to full-fledged hand-holding, mind you, but he might hook a finger around one of mine. And for that fleeting instant, I am transported back to when he was a snuggly little boy who wanted nothing more than to climb into my lap or snuggle up next to me on the couch, pressing his warm body to mine. Sigh.
2. I'm in the midst of purging and decluttering. The closets, the basement, the kitchen cabinets, my office.... As a result, we have pictures and posters leaning up against random walls throughout the house, waiting for me to decide where they will be hung, or whether, in fact, they will be hung. One such item was a gift when we had Josh. One of Bret's co-workers cross-stitched "Joshua" and framed it. It hung in his bedroom until we moved into this house. Now, I don't know what to do with it. I expect I'll hang onto it, although the odds are probably pretty slim that any of the children will have a son named Josh (or even if they did, they may not want this particular piece of art).
3. My BSF study is a real treasure, and I love the time I spend sitting with the Word. I need to devote more of my time to that.
January 8
Light that caught you, a Reflection that surprised you, a Shadow that fell lovely
This one hung me up a bit, so I put it off for the next day. And then I got sick and lost the next few days.
1. I love the dusky light just before sunset. I love the way the sky is tinged with pink and blue and violet. There's a certain intersection where I always get stopped by the red light, and it seems like the light always just hits a church steeple in that perfect way. I'm actually happy to be stopped for a few minutes, so I can admire the rosy tint on the cream-colored paint.
2. People tell me that they think Jacob looks just like his big brother did when he was the same age. I never see it, becuase they have such different looks. But every so often Jacob does something and I am transported back 5 years to when Josh did the exact same thing. He definitely has acquired some of his brother's mannerisms.
3. Back in September, Jessie and I went to San Francisco for a girls' weekend with friends. That first afternoon, we ended up at the national cemetery at the Presidio. The girls spent about 30 minutes examining and exploring the various gravestones, and I took some photos. One of my favorites shows a hillside of graves -- some shrouded in shadows and others shining brightly in the sunlight. I love the contrast.
This one hung me up a bit, so I put it off for the next day. And then I got sick and lost the next few days.
1. I love the dusky light just before sunset. I love the way the sky is tinged with pink and blue and violet. There's a certain intersection where I always get stopped by the red light, and it seems like the light always just hits a church steeple in that perfect way. I'm actually happy to be stopped for a few minutes, so I can admire the rosy tint on the cream-colored paint.
2. People tell me that they think Jacob looks just like his big brother did when he was the same age. I never see it, becuase they have such different looks. But every so often Jacob does something and I am transported back 5 years to when Josh did the exact same thing. He definitely has acquired some of his brother's mannerisms.
3. Back in September, Jessie and I went to San Francisco for a girls' weekend with friends. That first afternoon, we ended up at the national cemetery at the Presidio. The girls spent about 30 minutes examining and exploring the various gravestones, and I took some photos. One of my favorites shows a hillside of graves -- some shrouded in shadows and others shining brightly in the sunlight. I love the contrast.
Wednesday, January 9, 2013
January 7
3 Graces From People I Love
1. Bret and I had a discussion the other day that could have evolved into an argument, and he dropped it before it was able to progress.
2. On the way to Syllables, I received a phone call from a friend I hadn't connected with in a while, and Jacob was content to be silent in the back seat during my conversation. He had been telling me a story and he quite graciously picked up where he left off after my phone call.
3. Sorting through all of Mom's old Red Cross paperwork (that Dad brought to me "in case I wanted it"), I was reminded of all the times when she nagged me about keeping good records. Then, I saw it as nagging -- now, I see it as her "having my back."
1. Bret and I had a discussion the other day that could have evolved into an argument, and he dropped it before it was able to progress.
2. On the way to Syllables, I received a phone call from a friend I hadn't connected with in a while, and Jacob was content to be silent in the back seat during my conversation. He had been telling me a story and he quite graciously picked up where he left off after my phone call.
3. Sorting through all of Mom's old Red Cross paperwork (that Dad brought to me "in case I wanted it"), I was reminded of all the times when she nagged me about keeping good records. Then, I saw it as nagging -- now, I see it as her "having my back."
Monday, January 7, 2013
January 6
One Thing in Your Bag, Your Fridge, Your Heart
1. To be precise, this item is currently in the pocket of my jeans. But it is supposed to be in my purse, and it will be by the time I head out at lunchtime. I bought this new lip color last summer -- Maybelline's Super Stay 24-Hour Color in Always Heather. I love it, because it's designed for people like me. I am terrible about remembering to put on my lipstick, which is funny because lipstick is the one bit of makeup that my mom never left home without. Anyway, you apply the color with a wand like lip gloss, then let it dry for about a minute before applying the clear balm-like gloss over it. And it stays all day long. If your lips get dry, you just reapply the balm and voila, new lips! The other night Jessie and Bret went to the Father-Daughter Sock Hop hosted by our GS Service Unit, and I put some of the lip gloss on her. She loves to wear lipstick, but it inevitably smears and her lips are already full enough without the expanded lip lines. This was perfect, and the color looked great on her. It's amazing how just lip gloss, even with no other makeup, made her look so much more grown up. Sigh.
2. The last tiny bit of my annual Christmas toffee is in a little tin on the top shelf of the fridge. I don't think anyone else in the family knows it's there, and I'm not inclined to remind them. I wonder how long it will last ...
3. My heart is full. I have a full life and it is exactly how I want it. I may wish for more time or better organizational skills, but those are within my control and I'm working on achieving both. My heart is ... well, troubled might be the best word ... for both my boys. Jacob for his dyslexia and the frustration that he feels as a result. And Josh for his challenges at school. I want to get to the bottom of his handwriting and organizational issues. And I still feel guilt over not addressing the SI issues years ago, but right now the academic issus are outweighing it. I need to get going on the paperwork and see what we can learn before school's out, and to be honest, I'm a bit overwhelmed by it.
1. To be precise, this item is currently in the pocket of my jeans. But it is supposed to be in my purse, and it will be by the time I head out at lunchtime. I bought this new lip color last summer -- Maybelline's Super Stay 24-Hour Color in Always Heather. I love it, because it's designed for people like me. I am terrible about remembering to put on my lipstick, which is funny because lipstick is the one bit of makeup that my mom never left home without. Anyway, you apply the color with a wand like lip gloss, then let it dry for about a minute before applying the clear balm-like gloss over it. And it stays all day long. If your lips get dry, you just reapply the balm and voila, new lips! The other night Jessie and Bret went to the Father-Daughter Sock Hop hosted by our GS Service Unit, and I put some of the lip gloss on her. She loves to wear lipstick, but it inevitably smears and her lips are already full enough without the expanded lip lines. This was perfect, and the color looked great on her. It's amazing how just lip gloss, even with no other makeup, made her look so much more grown up. Sigh.
2. The last tiny bit of my annual Christmas toffee is in a little tin on the top shelf of the fridge. I don't think anyone else in the family knows it's there, and I'm not inclined to remind them. I wonder how long it will last ...
3. My heart is full. I have a full life and it is exactly how I want it. I may wish for more time or better organizational skills, but those are within my control and I'm working on achieving both. My heart is ... well, troubled might be the best word ... for both my boys. Jacob for his dyslexia and the frustration that he feels as a result. And Josh for his challenges at school. I want to get to the bottom of his handwriting and organizational issues. And I still feel guilt over not addressing the SI issues years ago, but right now the academic issus are outweighing it. I need to get going on the paperwork and see what we can learn before school's out, and to be honest, I'm a bit overwhelmed by it.
January 5
Something You're Reading, Making, Seeing
1. My list of To-Read books is getting longer by the day and I haven't taken much time to read for myself lately. Well, actually, for the past few months, when I think about it. I love books, love to read and am terrible about neglecting everything when I'm immersed in a good book. Right now most of the books I'm reading have to do with dyslexia, and I still can't seem to wrap my brain around what it's like for Jacob. I just started The Dyslexia Advantage by Fernette and Brock Eide. And I ran across The Inheritance by L. M. Alcott the other day. I can't remember much about it, so I'm re-reading it. As well as Uh-Oh by Robert Fulghum. But the main thing that I'm reading is Bret's first draft of his new kid-lit novel. Josh really likes it, so you never know -- maybe this will be the one that launches his career as a novelist.
2. I have a list of things I need to make today. Most of them involve Meyer lemons, since Leigh gave me a bag from her mother's tree and they only have a few day left in them. Lemon poppyseed muffins for Josh, lemon pound cake and perhaps some lemon curd? I'm a bit intimidated by the curd, but I want to try it. Oh, and I'd really like to try my hand at some home-made limoncello. Lemons make me happy. Just the scent of them restores my spirit and my mood.
3. Sitting at my desk, I look outside to the front yard. In August we had sod put down, and it made us so happy to have pretty, green Bermuda grass growing, rather than sparse Fescue and weeds. Now it's all dormant and brown, and you can still see some of the lines where it still needs to grow together. But by summer it should be gorgeous. Who knew something so simple as grass would make me happy?
1. My list of To-Read books is getting longer by the day and I haven't taken much time to read for myself lately. Well, actually, for the past few months, when I think about it. I love books, love to read and am terrible about neglecting everything when I'm immersed in a good book. Right now most of the books I'm reading have to do with dyslexia, and I still can't seem to wrap my brain around what it's like for Jacob. I just started The Dyslexia Advantage by Fernette and Brock Eide. And I ran across The Inheritance by L. M. Alcott the other day. I can't remember much about it, so I'm re-reading it. As well as Uh-Oh by Robert Fulghum. But the main thing that I'm reading is Bret's first draft of his new kid-lit novel. Josh really likes it, so you never know -- maybe this will be the one that launches his career as a novelist.
2. I have a list of things I need to make today. Most of them involve Meyer lemons, since Leigh gave me a bag from her mother's tree and they only have a few day left in them. Lemon poppyseed muffins for Josh, lemon pound cake and perhaps some lemon curd? I'm a bit intimidated by the curd, but I want to try it. Oh, and I'd really like to try my hand at some home-made limoncello. Lemons make me happy. Just the scent of them restores my spirit and my mood.
3. Sitting at my desk, I look outside to the front yard. In August we had sod put down, and it made us so happy to have pretty, green Bermuda grass growing, rather than sparse Fescue and weeds. Now it's all dormant and brown, and you can still see some of the lines where it still needs to grow together. But by summer it should be gorgeous. Who knew something so simple as grass would make me happy?
Friday, January 4, 2013
January 4
A Gift Old, New and Blue
Hmmm. I didn't read the list this morning so I didn't go through the day with these particulars in mind.
1. Last year Mema downsized when she moved into a new community, and she gave us some of her treasures. The bronze bust of William Shakespeare now greets people when they enter our house, and Granddaddy's Tiki Bar is in our newly tiled great room downstairs. When we were going through all the boxes in an attempt to organize the storage room in the basement, we ran across a huge box containing her silver tea service. I already have one from my own grandmother, stored neatly in its custom case. But I brought this one upstairs, spent an evening with the silver polish, and now it resides on a table (also inherited from Mema in the Great Purge) in my living room. Yes, it's a bit fancy for my house, and it takes up the entire table top, but I love it. It reminds me of the many dinners at their home, which were a huge treat for me when we lived near them in Miami, since I'd never lived in the same town as my own grandparents.
2. In 3 months we're going on a Disney Cruise over Spring Break. It was our big "family gift" at Christmas, and for my birthday Bret's mom gave me a spa treatment on the trip. I can't wait. It's going to be a fantastic trip for all of us, and I will quite happily spend some time in the spa. Last night Josh went exploring on the web site and informed me that the spa is directly above our cabin, so it will be about 100 steps for me to get there. Nice to know, I guess.
3. For Christmas last week my boys gave me a Willow Tree figurine. I already have a lot of the angels and family figurines, as well as the Nativity, but this is one of her new ones -- the Holy Family. It's not really a nativity, so I think I'm going to leave it out year-round. And unlike most of her other figurines, this one has color. Mary's robe is a beautiful shade of blue. I just love it.
Hmmm. I didn't read the list this morning so I didn't go through the day with these particulars in mind.
1. Last year Mema downsized when she moved into a new community, and she gave us some of her treasures. The bronze bust of William Shakespeare now greets people when they enter our house, and Granddaddy's Tiki Bar is in our newly tiled great room downstairs. When we were going through all the boxes in an attempt to organize the storage room in the basement, we ran across a huge box containing her silver tea service. I already have one from my own grandmother, stored neatly in its custom case. But I brought this one upstairs, spent an evening with the silver polish, and now it resides on a table (also inherited from Mema in the Great Purge) in my living room. Yes, it's a bit fancy for my house, and it takes up the entire table top, but I love it. It reminds me of the many dinners at their home, which were a huge treat for me when we lived near them in Miami, since I'd never lived in the same town as my own grandparents.
2. In 3 months we're going on a Disney Cruise over Spring Break. It was our big "family gift" at Christmas, and for my birthday Bret's mom gave me a spa treatment on the trip. I can't wait. It's going to be a fantastic trip for all of us, and I will quite happily spend some time in the spa. Last night Josh went exploring on the web site and informed me that the spa is directly above our cabin, so it will be about 100 steps for me to get there. Nice to know, I guess.
3. For Christmas last week my boys gave me a Willow Tree figurine. I already have a lot of the angels and family figurines, as well as the Nativity, but this is one of her new ones -- the Holy Family. It's not really a nativity, so I think I'm going to leave it out year-round. And unlike most of her other figurines, this one has color. Mary's robe is a beautiful shade of blue. I just love it.
January 3
Three Graces Overheard
This one was tough, especially since the kids went back to school today and I spent most of the day in solitude.
1. In the car on the way to Josh's orthodontist appointment, I told the kids that since our "babysitting experiment" went so well the other night (we went to a party and left Josh in charge since none of our regular babysitters were available), we might actually be ready to make it a more frequent occurrence. And since they'll be saving us quite a few babysitting dollars, we would put the saved money into a special jar -- and they can collectively decide how to spend it. Maybe they'll want to save it for spending money on vacation, or use it to buy an XBox -- they can decide. It will be an interesting experiment in cooperation, but I enjoyed listening to them debate the merits of each option.
2. In the car on the way home from the afore-mentioned orthodontist appointment, Josh was surly and snarly with all of us, but especially his sister, who was sharing the back seat with him. But even after he snarled at her and accused her of "enjoying his torment and pain," she didn't lose her temper and lash back. That was definitely grace.
3. I love to hear Josh say grace at dinner. His are short and sweet and to the point. There's food on the table, after all, and we'd hate for it to get cold. But they always end with "please bless us, everyone we care about, and even those we don't." It always tickles me, and he gives me dirty looks every time I giggle during grace, but I think he's gotten the real point of grace. After all, it's easy to ask for blessings for those we love, but we need to remember those we don't, too.
This one was tough, especially since the kids went back to school today and I spent most of the day in solitude.
1. In the car on the way to Josh's orthodontist appointment, I told the kids that since our "babysitting experiment" went so well the other night (we went to a party and left Josh in charge since none of our regular babysitters were available), we might actually be ready to make it a more frequent occurrence. And since they'll be saving us quite a few babysitting dollars, we would put the saved money into a special jar -- and they can collectively decide how to spend it. Maybe they'll want to save it for spending money on vacation, or use it to buy an XBox -- they can decide. It will be an interesting experiment in cooperation, but I enjoyed listening to them debate the merits of each option.
2. In the car on the way home from the afore-mentioned orthodontist appointment, Josh was surly and snarly with all of us, but especially his sister, who was sharing the back seat with him. But even after he snarled at her and accused her of "enjoying his torment and pain," she didn't lose her temper and lash back. That was definitely grace.
3. I love to hear Josh say grace at dinner. His are short and sweet and to the point. There's food on the table, after all, and we'd hate for it to get cold. But they always end with "please bless us, everyone we care about, and even those we don't." It always tickles me, and he gives me dirty looks every time I giggle during grace, but I think he's gotten the real point of grace. After all, it's easy to ask for blessings for those we love, but we need to remember those we don't, too.
Thursday, January 3, 2013
January 2
A Gift Outside, Inside, On a Plate
1. The big red dumpster that is taking up space in my driveway. Even though I backed into it last week, it has been a real gift for us. It is filled with debris from the basement pre-tiling demolition and purge, and it made our project much easier. I'm ready for the company to come pick it up, though.
2. My Christmas trees, which will be coming down this weekend on Epiphany. I love the family tree in the sun room, with the ornaments we've collected throughout our 22 years together. It's filled with ornaments made by the kids, as well as some from our own childhoods. Whenever we travel, we buy an ornament to put on the tree, and we love to reminisce as we hang them up every Christmas. And my "Angel Tree" in the foyer makes me so happy. When we bought this house, Bret bought me the tree for my birthday to put in the foyer. It's on the smaller side, but it's the perfect size to display all of the angel ornaments I've accumulated over the years. I also hang all the photo ornaments there, even though the kids don't always act like angels. Every time I come down the stairs, go into my office or in and out of the front door, I am welcomed by my tree, and it makes me smile.
3. I try to have a dinner date with Jacob after his Syllables session at least once a month. It's difficult, since usually we take Jessie with us, and Mondays are out due to Josh's Boy Scout meetings and Bret's BSF. But today we left everyone at home and went to Chili's for dinner, just the two of us, after Syllables. Chili's is one of his favorites, because of Paradise Pie (he's a boy after my own heart). While we waited for our meal, we played a game he'd just learned at Syllables and he was so proud to explain how it worked, before beating me. As we shared our Paradise Pie, he beamed at me and told me that he couldn't stop smiling because he was so happy we were on a date. And also because he had such a pretty mommy, and also that he really liked the shirt I was wearing. He's pretty good with the compliments -- he's not embarrassed to show affection the way his big brother is, and I pray that he stays that way. Unabashed love and Paradise Pie. Yum.
1. The big red dumpster that is taking up space in my driveway. Even though I backed into it last week, it has been a real gift for us. It is filled with debris from the basement pre-tiling demolition and purge, and it made our project much easier. I'm ready for the company to come pick it up, though.
2. My Christmas trees, which will be coming down this weekend on Epiphany. I love the family tree in the sun room, with the ornaments we've collected throughout our 22 years together. It's filled with ornaments made by the kids, as well as some from our own childhoods. Whenever we travel, we buy an ornament to put on the tree, and we love to reminisce as we hang them up every Christmas. And my "Angel Tree" in the foyer makes me so happy. When we bought this house, Bret bought me the tree for my birthday to put in the foyer. It's on the smaller side, but it's the perfect size to display all of the angel ornaments I've accumulated over the years. I also hang all the photo ornaments there, even though the kids don't always act like angels. Every time I come down the stairs, go into my office or in and out of the front door, I am welcomed by my tree, and it makes me smile.
3. I try to have a dinner date with Jacob after his Syllables session at least once a month. It's difficult, since usually we take Jessie with us, and Mondays are out due to Josh's Boy Scout meetings and Bret's BSF. But today we left everyone at home and went to Chili's for dinner, just the two of us, after Syllables. Chili's is one of his favorites, because of Paradise Pie (he's a boy after my own heart). While we waited for our meal, we played a game he'd just learned at Syllables and he was so proud to explain how it worked, before beating me. As we shared our Paradise Pie, he beamed at me and told me that he couldn't stop smiling because he was so happy we were on a date. And also because he had such a pretty mommy, and also that he really liked the shirt I was wearing. He's pretty good with the compliments -- he's not embarrassed to show affection the way his big brother is, and I pray that he stays that way. Unabashed love and Paradise Pie. Yum.
January 1, 2013
3 Gifts Heard
1. "Happy New Year" shouted in chorus by four children as December 31, 2012 became January 1, 2013. I think this was the first time my kids have all stayed up until midnight, so it was a new experience for them. Josh proclaimed the dropping of the ball at Times Square "anticlimactic" but they all had fun setting off fireworks and playing with sparklers, so I expect this will not be the last time for them.
2. The sweet sound of giggles as Jessie and her new friend enjoy just being together, whether it's eating dinner with the family, playing Just Dance on the Wii, watching a movie, giving each other makeovers or snuggling in bed sharing favorite parts of books with each other.
3. The sound of video games from the basement. After spending last week tiling the basement, we are all very happy to have a place where the kids -- and Daddy! -- can go to play games or watch movies without being in the middle of the living room. It's time.
1. "Happy New Year" shouted in chorus by four children as December 31, 2012 became January 1, 2013. I think this was the first time my kids have all stayed up until midnight, so it was a new experience for them. Josh proclaimed the dropping of the ball at Times Square "anticlimactic" but they all had fun setting off fireworks and playing with sparklers, so I expect this will not be the last time for them.
2. The sweet sound of giggles as Jessie and her new friend enjoy just being together, whether it's eating dinner with the family, playing Just Dance on the Wii, watching a movie, giving each other makeovers or snuggling in bed sharing favorite parts of books with each other.
3. The sound of video games from the basement. After spending last week tiling the basement, we are all very happy to have a place where the kids -- and Daddy! -- can go to play games or watch movies without being in the middle of the living room. It's time.
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